


I'm Not a Hero (I'm a Menace to Society)

by EverydayGeek



Category: Jessica Jones (TV)
Genre: F/F, Friendship/Love, Self-Denial, Self-Esteem Issues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-10
Updated: 2015-12-10
Packaged: 2018-05-06 01:40:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,064
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5398058
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EverydayGeek/pseuds/EverydayGeek
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jessica Jones wasn't the hero Trish deserved. But maybe one day she could be.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I'm Not a Hero (I'm a Menace to Society)

**Author's Note:**

> Just contributing to the Jessica/Trish community. I hope you like this little one-shot.

Jessica Jones was not a hero.

No matter how many times the people she'd saved did their best to convince her otherwise, she would never allow herself to believe it. She wasn't like Captain America, who selflessly put the well-being of others before his own. She didn't come to the rescue of citizens in need, wearing a mysterious mask and a swooping cape, spouting off some cheesy catchphrase that spoke of truth and justice. She didn't run in the direction of every scream of terror that reached her ears; instead, she ran in the other direction and got blackout drunk in her shithole apartment.

Jessica wasn't a superhero. Not by a longshot.

But when Trish looked at her with those adoring green eyes, and told her that she was the hero she'd always wanted her to be, Jessica almost believed that she wasn't a complete fuckup. She almost believed that she could make a difference in the world and be the hero that New York City deserved. She almost believed that she could be the hero that  _Trish_  deserved. Almost.

When she allowed her mind to drift to the possibility of being more than an asshole with an attitude, the harsh reality of her situation would rear its ugly head and remind her that, no, she could never be a hero. Heroes weren't selfish dicks who purposely put others at risk for their own personal gain. Heroes would never kill an innocent woman and lead the widower of said woman to believe that her death was an accident. Heroes would never put an innocent man at risk just so they could use them as a distraction while they stole anesthesia from a local hospital.

Heroes were supposed to help the helpless, not exploit or mislead them. How was she any better than those sleazy politicians who exploited impoverished individuals to garner votes? How was she any better than Trish's mom who used her daughter's fame to better her own life? While she may not be an abusive sociopath hell-bent on destroying the lives of others, she was still responsible for the suffering of multiple people. She was the one responsible for Trish getting hurt and nearly losing her life, after all.

Trish had been hurt, time and time again, just for being associated with her. She'd almost lost her life because Killgrave knew what she meant to her.  _How_   _much_  she meant to her.

It was no secret that Trish meant everything to Jessica. She was the most important thing in her life and, as much as she tried keeping Trish out of harm's way, the blonde would come back with a vengeance, arms swinging and guns blazing. She was a stubborn one, that girl, and as much as Jessica hated putting her in danger, she couldn't help but feel safe and looked after when in the other woman's presence. When she was with Trish, she felt loved; secure, almost. An army of gifted people could come looking for Jessica with the intention of killing her, but Trish would sooner surrender herself than let them get anywhere near her.

Jessica didn't know if Trish's fearlessness was admirable or stupid, but she loved her for it anyway.

Even with her abilities, Jessica hadn't been able to protect Trish from harm's way. Trish, however, with her lack of superhuman abilities, had managed to save Jessica on multiple occassions. While Jessica would never consider  _herself_  a hero, she would, without a doubt, consider her best friend one.

"What are you thinking about?" Trish asked with furrowed brows, noticing the worry lines wrinkling her friend's forehead.

Jessica looked up at her friend and shrugged. "I'm thinking about superheroes."

That caught Trish off-guard. "What about superheroes?"

Jessica smiled, locking eyes with her friend's curious gaze. "I just realized that not all of them have super powers."

Trish tilted her head at that, staring at her friend curiously. "Are you calling me a superhero, Jessica Jones?" she asked with a playful smirk stretching across her lips, though there was a hint of sincerity in her tone.

Jessica shrugged, not liking the sappy route the conversation had taken. It was her fault for opening her damn mouth in the first place. With a sigh, she answered honestly, "Yes, Trish, that's exactly what I'm calling you." The kiss she received on her cheek was so sudden, but carried enough warmth to turn her insides to mush. Clearing her throat awkwardly, she asked "what was that for?"

"Thinking you can get away with referring to me as a hero and not yourself."

"Trish."

"You're not perfect, Jess. You're human, you make mistakes, but you've saved the lives of more people than either of us can count and have bettered the lives-"

"I've bettered no one's life."

Trish smiled at her friend, shaking her head in amused disbelief. Most likely disbelief with the fact that they were having this conversation yet again. "Tell that to Malcolm and the people you saved who were under Killgrave's control. Tell that to me. To my face." Trish challenged, her eyebrow raised, daring Jessica to refute her statement.

"I nearly got all of them killed. I nearly got  _you_  killed."

Trish shrugged. "You saved most of them, and you saved me. Even heroes have to deal with losses; you can't save everyone. But you tried, and that's what matters," said Trish. "Not all heroes wear capes and see things in black and white. Some heroes are a little fucked up and a little lost, but as long as they have the right intentions in mind, then they're a hero in my book."

"That 'Trish Talks' shit is turning you into a sap," Jessica joked, wanting desperately to end the conversation. Rising from her seat on Trish's couch, she walked into the kitchen, intent on getting into the liquor cabinet. "I'm getting a drink."

"Even heroes need to get wasted every once in a while." Trish called from her spot on the couch, a self-satisfied smirk on her lips.

Jessica sighed, grabbed a bottle of half-finished tequila, and brought the bottle to her lips for a long, hearty gulp. Jessica wasn't a hero, no, but maybe she could work on becoming the hero that Trish deserved.

Maybe one day she'd be more than just Trish's hero and best friend.

Maybe one day she'd finally deserve to call Trish  _hers_.


End file.
